Census Groaner

My current job with the Postal Service involves gathering data on random samplings of mail; letters, large envelopes, packages of all shapes and sizes. Anything people mail, I'm going to see it, eventually.

So yeah, I see a lot of mail. Every day. In a different post office each day, but it pretty much all looks the same. And there's a lot of it.

Did I mention I see a lot of mail?

What I'm seeing an awful lot of these days are the questionnaires the U.S. Census Bureau is sending out. So you might as well find out what it's all about. There's actually a bunch of interesting stuff on that site.

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AN OLDIE BUT A GOODIE (Groaner Division)

A Census Taker appeared on a porch one afternoon and knocked on the door. When it was answered, he proceeded to introduce himself, explained how quick the process would be, and obtained permission to begin his brief interview.

Shortly he came to the question, "How many children do you have?"

The woman at the door replied, "Four."

"And may I have their names, please?"

"Let's see," she said, "there's little Edward - we call him Eenee - and Michael - he has a temper, so we call him Meanie - and our littlest one, Joshua - he's a bit possessive; we call him Mynee. Oh, and then there's Frank."

"Your children's names are Eenee, Meanie, Mynee, and Frank?"

"Yes, sir."

"May I ask why you nicknamed the last child Frank?"

"We didn't want any Moe."

[Pastor Tim's Cybersalt Digest; paraphrased]

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WORDS for YOUR WEEK: "The U.S. Census reports that statistically, Las Vegas is very similar to Washington, DC. The chief difference, of course, is that in Vegas you gamble with your own money." (Jay Leno)

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