Monday, May 31, 2010

Rough Adjustment

Memorial Day, 2010. Once called "Decoration Day."

Mental Floss has ten things to know about Memorial Day.

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SIGNS YOUR VETERAN MAY BE HAVING TROUBLE READJUSTING TO LIFE AT HOME

Plants a minefield in the garden to keep the rabbits out.

When leaving for a car ride and someone calls, "Shotgun!" he hits the deck.

She sprinkles sand on all her food.

Keeps referring to the punks up the street as "insurgents."

Refuses to drink any water that doesn't come in a can.

Tells almost everyone he sees, "Get a haircut!"

Refers to your pressure cooker as an IED.

Accidentally hits his thumb with a hammer, curls up into a ball and yells, "Medic!"


[selected from Chris White's Top Five on the Military]

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WELCOME to YOUR WEEK: Well, we know that today is Memorial Day here in the States, but since it's the last day of the month, let's sneak a peek into June. June is Cancer from the Sun Month, Dairy Alternative Month, Fireworks Safety Month, International Men's Month, Turkey Lovers Month, National Bathroom Reading Month, Rebuild Your Life Month, and my favorite, National Accordion Awareness Month. And that's just a bit of the list. Oh, and Wednesday is the sixth annual Leave the Office Early Day.

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Mark's Musings is available via RSS Feed, Facebook Note, Amazon Kindle and via e-mail each weekday (usually). Subscriptions are free.

Friday, May 28, 2010

Rusty Skills

Those of you who read my musings at work probably won't see this until Tuesday, victim of my schedule forcing me into late evening writing - if I've been able to write at all - this week. Which means you'll be on the wrong side of our long weekend that kicks off summer here in the U.S. You have my pity.

If this is when you break out your grill for the next four months - or even if you never put it away - Reader's Digest has 30+ summer recipes to try out.

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SIGNS YOUR COOKING SKILLS HAVE GOTTEN RUSTY

You know one of these is a strainer, and one is a flyswatter. If only you could remember which is which.

Your kids say they're eating at a friend's house ... for the next month.

Your husband just gobbled down your preschooler's macaroni picture and liked it better than the supper you made.

You call a spatula "that flat flippy-turner paddle."

You have to clean the spider webs out of your oven before using it.

You just Googled instructions on how to cook a Pop Tart.

Every night at 6:15, the local pizza place calls *you.*


[Chris White's Top Five on Food w/edits and additional material by Mark Raymond]

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WEBSITE of the WEEK: Whenever my wife and I are watching a show lately, it seems there's always one actor who pops up and one of us will say, "Oh, where have we seen him/her before?" We'll usually come up with the answer but when we can't, we turn to http://www.imdb.com. I've featured this website before (June 23, 2006), but since then they've added more and more features and it's worth a revisit. Pretty much any and every actor who's made a movie or appeared on television will be listed here, along with everything they've ever been in.

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Mark's Musings is available via RSS Feed, Facebook Note, Amazon Kindle and via e-mail each weekday (usually). Subscriptions are free.

Thursday, May 27, 2010

Understanding Fujita


I worked a very strange shift today. The work wasn't odd, the hours were. Mailed out another issue of my union newsmagazine after work, had my annual diabetic eye exam (no "diabetic retinopathy," thank you), and went with my wife and daughter to our family doctor to discuss an ongoing issue.

Sadly, nowhere in that day was there a place for me to chisel out uploading my post for e-mail. So you get just the blog again today.

I see that on this day in 1896, 255 people in Saint Louis, Missouri were killed when a tornado struck.

Of course, we have much better detection and early warning systems in place today, but still, those things can be dicey. As the weather warms (unless you're living south of the equator), it might be a good time to review your tornado safety tips from the National Oceanic and Atmospheric Administration.

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Understanding the "F"-rated Fujita Scale for tornadoes:

F1: Laughable little string of wind unless it comes through your house, then enough to make your insurance company drop you like a brick. People enjoy standing on their porches to watch this kind.

F2: Strong enough to blow your car into your house, unless of course you drive an Expedition and live in a mobile home, then strong enough to blow your house into your car.

F3: Will pick your house and your Expedition up and move you to the other side of town.

F4: Usually ranging from 1/2 to a full mile wide, this tornado can turn an Expedition into a Pinto, then gift wrap it in a semi truck.

F5: The Mother of all Tornadoes, you might as well stand on your front porch and watch it, because it's probably going to be - literally - quite a last sight.


[selected from sillydog.org]


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WISDOM for YOUR WEEK: "The Lord is slow to anger and great in power; the Lord will not leave the guilty unpunished. His way is in the whirlwind and the storm, and clouds are the dust of his feet." (Nahum 1:3)

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Mark's Musings is seen with an RSS Feed, a Facebook Note, the Amazon Kindle and your e-mail each weekday (usually). Subscriptions are free.

Wednesday, May 26, 2010

Wedding Toss


The first date I ever had with my wife was attending a friend's wedding.

And as we stand on the cusp of Memorial Day kicking off another summertime, that season is here once again.

I'm not crazy about all the ads distracting the eye at Oprah's website, but there's a pretty good article about how to be a great guest at a wedding. I picked up a few tips.

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Although we were being married in New Hampshire, I wanted to add a touch of my home state - Kansas - to the wedding. My fiancée, in explaining this to a friend, said that meant we were going to have guests throw wheat, instead of rice, as we left the church.

Our friend thought for a moment, then solemnly said, "It's a good thing he's not from Idaho!"


[Joe's Clean Laffs]

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WORD for YOUR WEEK: So from where do we get the word "nuptials"? Once again, it goes back to Latin, where nubere meant "take as husband," or "marry." The past tense version was nupta, and nuptiae referred to the wedding.

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Mark's Musings courts an RSS Feed, engages a Facebook Note, elopes on the Amazon Kindle and commits to your e-mail each weekday. Subscriptions are free, but we're keeping separate checking accounts.

Tuesday, May 25, 2010

Borrowed Bottle


Well, between another big car repair, union politics gone explosive, and some pressing family issues, I had to give yesterday a miss. But I'm back today and hopefully the rest of the week!

Mental Floss magazine says you can spend between five minutes and, umm, the rest of the month checking out The Food Timeline ... a website that gives not only the history of food, but links to some yummy recipes using that very same food.

You may not agree with their timeline estimations, depending on how old you think the Earth may be, and I certainly don't agree with the estimate on how long you could spend browsing that site. i think you could take the rest of the *year.*

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Dianne had forgotten to buy the bottle of wine she had promised to bring to the dinner party. She called a neighbor to see if she could have one of his, with a promise to replace it later. He wasn't home, but Dianne had his house keys - for they often watched each other's homes - so she let herself in and chose an attractive bottle from his wine rack.

The host and guests at the party praised Dianne's choice of wine, and she managed to carefully remove the label from the bottle before she left the party so she could get the same kind for the replacement.

The local liquor store didn't carry that brand, but referred Dianne to another, more exclusive store, and they were delighted to sell her the replacement bottle ... for $98!

Dianne's neighbor returned home Sunday evening and Dianne took him the replacement bottle, thanking the man and praising his fine taste in wine. He proudly told her that he had bottled the vintage himself, from a homemade recipe ... he had found the wine bottle in a recycle bin and was attracted to its pretty label!


[ChapNotes via Doc's Daily Chuckle]

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WORDS for YOUR WEEK: "If you know someone who tries to drown their sorrows, you might tell them sorrows know how to swim." (H. Jackson Brown, Jr.)

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Mark's Musings is available via RSS Feed or Facebook Note or Amazon Kindle or e-mail each weekday. Subscriptions are free.

Monday, May 24, 2010

The Land of Arrrggghhhh


Weekend started off great.

Got busier.

Bad stuff happened.

Car blew up to the tune of $500.

Again.

Gah!

Blogging and e-mail posts will return to normal about the same time as my blood pressure.

Until then, carry on. Keep the faith.

Mostly.

Give some away.

Friday, May 21, 2010

Moon Love

It's a sacrificial love story, in four minutes and forty-five seconds, and with thanks to Jesus at the end, this will tug at your heartstrings for no known reason.





I know, I know, I'm just a sedimental old fool.

Moses' Bad News

Well, my wife and daughter are headed out of town for a nephew's graduation Open House this weekend. Goodness, is it that time of year already? Meanwhile, my band and I will once again be providing the worship and praise music for a Men's Conference out of town, as well. I guess we'll need someone to watch the cat overnight. Any volunteers? Bueller?

Hey, speaking of obscure movie references ... turns out Hollywood actor Kevin Costner is actually spending his millions on something worthwhile. He invested in "vacuum barge" technology and is *donating* six of these new contraptions (about $24 million worth) to British Petroleum to help clean up the Gulf Oil Spill. Pretty generous.

Maybe this will help offset that "Waterworld" movie....

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As the Israelites toiled under the slavery of the Egyptians, God called down to Moses one day.

"Moses," said the Lord, "I've got good news and bad news."

"Most Merciful God," Moses replied, "if I have brought you any favor, please give me the good news first."

"Moses, the good news is that I have chosen you to deliver my people from their bondage," God answered. "I will force Pharaoh to release my children by causing years of pestilence in Egypt. There will be plagues of locusts and frogs and incredible devastation will be upon the land. Pharaoh's armies will chase you as you try to leave, but do not fear for I will part the waters of the Red Sea to aid in your escape."

"Oh, great and mighty God, may it be as you say." Moses paused. "And the bad news?"

"You'll have to prepare the Environmental Impact Statement."

[Mikey's Funnies]

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WEBSITE of the WEEK: Barbara Feldman has been blogging for years. One of her first was about surfing the Internet with and for children. So if you have kids on the computer, or - from my average demographic - grandchildren on the Web - check out http://www.surfnetkids.com/. There's also a free newsletter you can get that brings her posts right into your Inbox. Just like me!

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Mark's Musings is, as always, available via RSS Feed or Facebook Note or Amazon Kindle or e-mail each weekday. Subscriptions are free.

Thursday, May 20, 2010

Boredom

I tell my kids, "there's no such thing as boredom. There are only unimaginative minds."

But I will admit there are times when circumstances could lead you to boredom, if you let them. Waiting rooms. Long lines. Repetitious tasks.

I generally make sure I have either my cell phone or Kindle by my side. They both have books on them. And when I'm not reading, I'm thinking about the next project, post, program, or nap. So I'm hardly ever bored.

But if I ever do get bored, I won't be for long.

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For the first few months of her internship with the state of Georgia, my sister had hardly anything to do, and spent the majority of her time surfing the Web or working crossword puzzles.

One day she expressed her boredom to a co-worker.

"Oh, I know," her friend commiserated, "everyone thinks us state employees have it easy, but there's only so much you can pretend you're doing!"


[Joe's Clean Laffs]

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WISDOM for YOUR WEEK: "I remember the days of long ago; I meditate on all your works and consider what your hands have done." (Psalm 143:5)

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Mark's Musings is available via RSS Feed, Facebook Note, Amazon Kindle, and e-mail each weekday. In the business of not boring your Inbox for 11 years. ISSN 2154-9761.

Wednesday, May 19, 2010

Twitterific

Just a reminder to my readers that you do *not* have to be a Twitter subscriber to see what I'm posting there. Just check out my Twitter Feed periodically. You can also catch my latest "tweets" from the home page of my website.

Twitter - which I once thought was a pretty useless addition to the whole social network scene - turns out to be pretty cool, after all, and more immediate than just about anything else out there. In fact, news bits go out on Twitter from respected sources such as network news, CNN, MSNBC, etc., even before Google is able to index them.

During a recent excursion to Comerica Park (where the Tigers play), my son and I kept up-to-date on the weather conditions - a rainout was entirely possible the day we visited - by sending the Tiger Tweets to my cell phone.

Tiger Tweets. Heh. Sounds funny to say that.

Anyway, speaking of the Tigers, check out this photo that I just viewed on the "TweetDeck." It's the ball cap that every major league team will be wearing on Memorial Day this year.

Closing Announcement


Pittsburgh's television station KDKA, Channel 2 (a CBS affiliate), recently ran a story about "how to get free stuff online."

It's a fair review of the largest and most reliable sites out there for receiving free samples and other items.

Sounds like just the kind of thing my readers might enjoy.

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In the upscale department store where I work, one of our customer service representatives make an announcement as closing time approaches, reminding everyone shopping that they have only a few minutes to finish browsing and buying.

One evening, one of our new representatives - who had recently worked for K-Mart - opened this evening announcement by saying, "Attention K-Mart shoppers...."

Quickly realizing her mistake, she tap-danced her way out of trouble by adding, with only the briefest of pauses, "...you are in the wrong store."


[Andychaps The_Funnies via Wit and Wisdom]

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WORD for YOUR WEEK: My wife wanted to know about this one. Samuel Jones was a lawyer in New York City. He was often called the Father of the New York Bar. He owned quite a bit of land but bequeathed it to the city when he passed with the small caveat that if a street should ever be built upon the land, it be named after him. Well, when the street was built, there was already another named Jones (in Greenwich Village), so New York decided to call the street Great Jones Street, due to the fact it was wider than the average city street. Mr. Jones' legacy, however, was besmirched when heroin junkies began living and hanging out in Great Jones Alley, built off Great Jones Street. And when they were craving a heroin fix, they said they were "jonesing" for one. Now the term has come to mean a craving or strong desire for any substance ... such as my yearning for a Tim Horton's cup of coffee recently, which began her questioning.

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Mark's Musings is free on an RSS Feed, discounted daily on a Facebook Note, always a deal for the Amazon Kindle, and economically e-mailed to your Inbox for free each weekday. Subscribe at my website. ISSN 2154-9761.

Tuesday, May 18, 2010

Retired Scientists

When Bill Watterson was creating the "Calvin and Hobbes" comic strip, it was one of my very favorites. The man had a way of combining art and words that made reading the strip marvelous. In fact, I still follow the daily reprinting of his archives at Go Comics.

Calvin's father, an office drone who enjoyed bicycling, time with his wife, and messing with Calvin's head - I mean, what father doesn't enjoy a little teasing with his kids - would often give Calvin goofy scientific explanations for common natural occurrences.

Much like this site. I may have to bookmark it as a favorite. It made me chuckle.

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THINGS SCIENTISTS CAN DO WHEN THEY RETIRE

Take up a hobby, like writing grant proposals.

Go to a theme park in Florida and tell everyone there about the principles of physics that underlie all the rides.

Same as everyone else: shout at the neighbor kids to get off their lawn.

Tour Europe. Or maybe Europa.

Prove the existence of It-Doesn't-Matter.

Investigate who those other people living in your house are.

Go fission.


[selected from Chris White's Top Five on Science, with edits and additional material by Mark Raymond]

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WORDS for YOUR WEEK: "There is something fascinating about science. One gets such wholesale returns of conjecture out of such a trifling investment of fact." (Mark Twain)

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Mark's Musings is researched on an RSS Feed (to the right), a Facebook Note, the Amazon Kindle, and flows via e-mail into your Inbox each weekday if you subscribe. ISSN 2154-9761.

Monday, May 17, 2010

Your Daily Affirmation

With thanks to little Jennifer, who's now about nine years older than seen in this video.

And honey, if you find me up on the bathroom sink tomorrow morning, this would be why:




With thanks to Facebook friend Michelle B.

Cheap Gas


When you're at the gas station, what's your routine?

I select the method of payment and the level of octane, then adjust the button that holds the pump handle for you to the lowest setting. Then I go clean something ... the windows, the mirrors, the headlights/taillights, maybe if I have time I'll even wipe off the inside of the windows and throw away the bits of trash and other flotsam that have accumulated over the week.

But then the pump stops. What do you do then? Call it quits and put away the nozzle, or top off the tank? If you top off, do you round up to the nearest dollar? Lately I've been rounding off to the nearest gallon so I can easily calculate my current miles-per-gallon.

But, as it turns out, maybe I shouldn't be doing that.

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When their family car developed a knock in the engine, my neighbor and I began discussing possible causes. I used to work as a mechanic so I suggested that it could be something as simple as cheap, poor quality gasoline.

My neighbor called his wife out and asked if she had purchased regular or premium gasoline the last time she had driven into town. She couldn't remember.

"You probably got the cheaper gas," my friend said to her. "That's probably why our engine is running roughly."

"No, the gas wasn't any cheaper!" my friend's wife replied, indignantly.

"Well, how much did it cost?" my friend asked, thinking if he knew the total he could guesstimate the type of gasoline she had bought.

"I didn't buy cheap gas," she answered. "It cost the same as always. I bought twenty dollars worth, just like I always do."


[Doc's Daily Chuckle via Sermon Fodder]

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WELCOME to YOUR WEEK: To keep things timely, I'll let you know that May is National Youth Traffic Safety Month ... it's National Dog Bite Prevention Week ... National New Friends, Old Friends Week ... National Transportation Week ... World Trade Week ... Emergency Medical Services Week ... National Effectiveness Week .... and National Bike to Work Week. And today is World Hypertension Day. So chill out.

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Mark's Musings fuels an RSS Feed (see link to the right), a Facebook Note, an Amazon Kindle, and your Inbox via e-mail each weekday. Subscribe here.

Friday, May 14, 2010

Little League


Shortly after the movie "Field of Dreams" came out, I read an interview with its star, Kevin Costner, and in it he said he had wanted to make a movie where, when the lights come up and the credits roll, it's the *guy* who reaches over, touches his girl's arm, and says, "Gimme a minute."

For me, anyway, he succeeded. I needed a minute. It is one of a very small handful of movies that has moved me to tears.

This makes me melancholy, as well.

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SIGNS YOUR LITTLE LEAGUE SEASON WON'T BE SO GOOD

You thought *last* year was awful with your Dad as Coach. This year? It's the vice-principal from your school.

In accordance with the league's new "mercy" rule, the umpire calls the game as soon as your team shows up.

The Coach tells Billy he's batting cleanup, then hands him a mop.

The ball caps provided by the team sponsor have a large "L" embroidered on the front, but your sponsor's business name is "Wally's Wash World."

Your manager? Charlie Brown.

Your best pitcher's fastball is clocked with a snail.


[selected w/some minor edits from Chris White's Top Five on Kids]

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WEBSITE of the WEEK: Patricia Hysell retired from Nursing, returned to school to learn about computers, and began writing. Now she writes a very nice blog chock full of historical trivia and insights called "Little Bits of History" at http://patriciahysell.wordpress.com/. She found me through my Facebook page and I'm happy to feature her work here. Enjoy!

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Mark's Musings is available via RSS Feed, Facebook page, Amazon Kindle, and e-mail each weekday. It would be a kindness if you'd subscribe.

Friday Post Delayed

Hey, troops, there *will* be a Friday post ... just not until this afternoon. Hang in there!

Thursday, May 13, 2010

Retro Commerce

Let's say you live in an apartment with a gorgeous view of the parking lot. Or perhaps an assisted living environment with minimal window space.

You may be a candidate for this.

They even tell you how to build it.

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RETRO COMMERCE?

They're calling them "stores" or "s-commerce," and they're being rolled out in towns and cities everywhere.

"It's a real revelation," according to Malcom Fosbury, a local worker. "You just walk into one of these stores and they have all sorts of things for sale."

Fosbury was particularly impressed by a clothes shop he discovered while browsing downtown recently. "Stores seem to be the ideal medium for transactions of this type. I can try out a jacket and see if it fits me. Then I can visualize the way I would look if I were actually wearing the clothing." This is now possible using a high-definition 2-D viewing system, or "mirror" as it has become more popularly known.

Stores, also called shops, are frequently aggregated into shopping promenades, or "malls," and are becoming increasingly popular with the cash-rich but time-poor generation of new consumers. Often located in densely-populated areas, people are finding them extremely convenient.

And Malcolm is not alone in being impressed by these shops. "Some days I just don't have the time to download huge Flash animations of rotating cross-trainers and then wait an additional five to ten days for them to be delivered and hope they will actually fit," says Sandra Bailey, a systems analyst for the city. "This way I can actually complete the transaction in real time and walk away with the goods."

Being able to see whether or not shoes and clothing fit has been a real bonus for Bailey. "I used to spend my evenings boxing up gear to return. Sometimes the clothes didn't fit, or sometimes they just sent the wrong stuff."

Retail analyst Carl Gentner testifies that, "Stores have a compelling commercial story to tell. There are massive efficiencies built into their supply chain. By concentrating distribution to a series of high volume outlets in malls, there are dramatic savings in fulfillment costs. I mean, compare that to the wasteful practice of delivering items piecemeal to people's homes."

Furthermore, allowing consumers to receive goods when they actually want them could mean an end to the frustration of returning home only to find a notice telling you that your goods are waiting in a dispatch warehouse on the other side of town.

But it's not just the convenience that appeals to Mr. Fosbury. "Going out and visiting a shop is a real relief for me. I mean, as it is I already spend all day in front of the stupid computer."


[adapted from jokefile.uk.com; edits and rewrites by Mark Raymond]

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WISDOM for YOUR WEEK: "Buy the truth and do not sell it; get wisdom, discipline and understanding." (Proverbs 23:23)

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Mark's Musings is available via RSS Feed, Facebook Page, Amazon Kindle, and e-mail each weekday. Get a subscription.

Wednesday, May 12, 2010

Waitstaff Words

Okay, so a few of you are curious as to what "ISSN" stands for. It stands for "International Standard Serial Number" and it is used by libraries, search engines, and others to index the periodical world.

Next question.

My wife, being mostly unemployed and enjoying a little extra time at home, has been watching a little extra television and her favorite channels remain HGTV and The Food Network. Because of her, I actually have some small understanding of who people like Paula Deen, Alton Brown, Bobby Flay, and Rocco DiSpirito are.

So this is for her ... and for anyone else who wants to eat a little lighter.

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THINGS YOU DON'T WANT TO HEAR FROM THE WAITSTAFF

"Oh, sorry, hon, we're all out of coffee."

"Tonight is 'Tip and Spit' night. The more you tip, the less we spit."

Any non-verbal rumbling from below their neck.

"Hey, lemme know if you find a rhinestone stud ... I dropped one of my nose piercings about five minutes ago."

"Okay, I'll put that order in, but you'll need to sign this waiver, first."


[selected from Chris White's Top Five on Food]

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WORD for YOUR WEEK: From the Romans the French adopted the word seison, which meant "sowing time." The word eventually came to denote any unspecified length of time. By then, people had learned that certain foods could benefit from a bit of aging, and this process churned out the verb, saissonner. In 1066 William the Conqueror brought the word to England where it became "season." Since seasoning some foods was meant to improve their taste, the word soon came to be applied to *anything* added to food that made it taste better.

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Mark's Musings is prepared for you fresh each day and arrives on a seasoned bed of Facebook Note, a silver platter of Amazon Kindle, an aptly-named RSS Feed, and served piping hot into your Inbox via e-mail. Subscribe. ISSN 2154-9761.

Tuesday, May 11, 2010

Love's Language


Ladies, is your man cold? Uncaring? The very picture of a stoic facade? When you watch a heartwarming movie together, are you dabbing away tears while he sits there, chuckling?

Now there's hope.

German and English scientists have developed a nasal spray using oxytocin, and tests indicate it is likely to make even the staunchest of cynics melt, open up to you, and give you that which you may want the most ... a good cuddle.

And you thought I was kidding.

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Couples who have lived together for a long time have developed their own method of communication.

One day I heard my mother yell upstairs to my father, "What are you looking for in that closet?"

My father yelled down, "Nothing!"

My mother thought a moment, then replied, "Well, it's not in there. Look under the bed!"


[submitted by list member Lavonne T.]

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WORDS for YOUR WEEK: "I like her because she smiles at me and means it." (Anonymous)

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Mark's Musings is sprayed onto an RSS Feed, sniffed in a Facebook Note, wafts on an Amazon Kindle, and makes your Inbox more fragrant via e-mail each weekday. Click to subscribe. ISSN 2154-9761.

Monday, May 10, 2010

Monday Groaners

Hey, thanks for letting me back into your Inbox! I've worked on a few "upgrades" over the last couple of weeks, so what's new around here?

The daily e-mails look more like the blog here, and I've joined the Twitter gang. During one of those conferences I told you about yesterday, I learned about social media and decided it was time. Facebook will be where I share thoughts, photos, bits of Scripture, snatches of lyrics, and personal activities. Twitter I will pretty much restrict to the occasional random thought or web link.

You'll notice some new "kickers" at the bottom of the post. Gone is Wednesday's "Wonder for Your Week," replaced by Monday's "Word for Your Week." Today is the debut of "Welcome to Your Week," which is a quick look at items our nation is celebrating, commemorating, or otherwise calling to your attention.

Finally, I have been officially recognized by the United States Library of Congress as a digital periodical, and I have been issued my ISSN, which has to appear on every post.

I must be doing something right, because last time I checked, when you Google "Mark's Musings," I come up as the number one search result. And in the online world, that's a pretty big deal.

It's a good birthday gift. Hey, did I mention it's my birthday? Remind me to share sometime why this is an emotionally pivotal year for me.

But okay, enough about me. On with the laughs. Because I know you must have missed them, here's....

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YOUR MONDAY GROANERS

News lead: "City officials say sewer repairs are going well, but are holding their breath until they are fully completed."

I know a girl who only dates during wet weather. She loves seeing a rain beau.

Did Rhett Butler have Scarlett fever?

My grandfather once got paid to quit smoking. He loved it. Said it was a kick-butt job.

Then there was the time when famed pantomime artist Marcel Marceau purchased a seafood restaurant in Bangor, Maine. They were known for their signature dish, filet of sole. Customers came from all over the country to enjoy both the food and the greeting given - mimed, of course - by the owner. In fact, all the employees became skilled in the art of pantomime. A sign over the kitchen doors proclaimed, "These are the mimes that fry Maine's soles."

The other day my wife sat at the kitchen table, looking bleary-eyed and haggard while she stared into her cup of coffee. I asked what was wrong and she replied, "Morning sickness." Shocked, I asked her when she had found out she was pregnant. "What?" she exclaimed. "I'm not pregnant! I'm just sick of mornings!"


[JokeMaster]

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WELCOME to YOUR WEEK: It's National ... Nursing Home Week, Police Week, Return to Work Week (how fitting is that?), Women's Health Week, Reading is Fun Week, and Salute to Moms Over 35 Week. And today is Windmill Day. Have a tilt at one.

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This blog is available via RSS Feed, Facebook Note, Amazon Kindle, and is sent via e-mail each weekday. Let Mark's Musings appear in your Inbox by clicking here. ISSN 2154-9761.

Sunday, May 09, 2010

Sabbatical's End

First of all, Happy Mother's Day!

Secondly, just a brief word about my sabbatical before the regular posts resume tomorrow.

It was, frankly, not very sabbatical-like, as I had to continue working and performing my union responsibilities, which included one state-wide convention, one labor press conference, and the publishing of our monthly newsmagazine. That took up the entire month of April. Then I began addressing some long overdue medical issues, which involved (and still involve) going to see physical therapists of one stripe or another five days a week.

However, it was a JOY to deal with these things without also having to juggle three other type of deadlines or commitments at the same time. The relief of being single-minded about something was palpable, and absolutely marvelous.

And, of course, I spent a great deal of time thinking and praying about what changes I need to make in my life to make sure I don't reach this point again for a long, long time. Toward that end, one decision I've made is that I'm not going to put insane amounts of pressure on myself to write a daily post for you. I'll do my best (which is pretty good, if I do say so myself), but if too much life comes between thee and me, I'll just post a little something here at the blog, and let the e-mail chips fall where they may.

So if you don't see Mark's Musings in your Inbox, it might be a good idea to bookmark this site as a favorite and see what's been updated.

To offset that occasional lapse in my regular offerings, I've taken the time to cook up a few revisions and additions to your Musings experience.

But more on that tomorrow, when I'm "officially" back, as I said I'd keep this short.

I can't thank you enough for the overwhelming support you gave me when I announced my sabbatical. It brought tears to my eyes every time I tried to tell someone about it.

You folks are awesome, and I truly believe I must be the most blessed of all God's children.

See you tomorrow.

Mark