Friday, October 24, 2008

Random Thoughts IV

I think you're overdue for the penultimate annual installment of Random Thoughts.

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RANDOM ACTS of THINKING
Part the Fourth

I went over to a friend's house and as I stood before his front door, I looked down. There I saw the words, "Please stay on the mat. Your visit is very important to us. Your knock will be answered in the order in which it was received."

I lost five pounds but they came back. I didn't recognize them, though, because they were disguised as pizza.

Coach says I don't know the meaning of the word, "fear." And I'm flunking math, too.

The only thing worse than a flooded basement is a flooded attic.

Courtship: a game of hearts once played with clubs, but now we use diamonds.

Love may be blind, but it can sure find its way around in the dark.

With all the genetic work being done today, someone should make celery so it doesn't sound like I'm stepping on a wicker basket when I eat it.

When money talks, nobody cares about the grammar it uses.

An engagement can often be described as a short period lacking in foresight followed by a long period loaded with hindsight.

I don't know what's wrong with my TV. I was getting both C-Span and the Home Shopping Network on the same channel. I actually bought a congressman.

I'm a self-made man. But if I had to do it over again, I'd call in a professional.

Could you call coffee "break fluid"?

Give some weeds an inch and they'll take a yard.

With gas prices these days, you can tell how seriously a couple is interested in each other by how far they're willing to drive.

[with thanks, gratitude, appreciation, indebtedness, warm feelings toward and a tip o'the Mark's Musings cap to Signals, Randy Glasbergen, Hilary Price, list member Cliff R., Menards, Bruce Baum, Pastor Tim, Dave Aufrance's Monday Fodder, Charlie's Chuckles, and let's not forget the mind of Mark Raymond]

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October has been "Pastor Appreciation Month" and I'm whipping up a little comedy with a friend for our church dinner this weekend honoring our Pastor. I hope you've done something this month to let your minister/priest/Right Reverend Person know how much you appreciate the long hours and low salary they willingly live with to provide your spiritual care and growth. If not, it's not too late!

I'll see you on Monday.

Mark

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WEB SITE of the WEEK: List member Nancy Z. has suggested - and I approve her message (obligatory political joke) - that we all use http://www.guerillamail.com/ when you need a temporary, disposable email address. You know, when you're interested in checking something on the Internet out, but the page you're on needs you to provide an email address only you're not sure if providing it will open the spam floodgates, use Guerilla Mail. The email address you provide will only be good for 15 minutes.

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Mark's Musings continues to be a Habeas-certified spam free mailer. Subscribe, view past issues in the Archives, and frolic all you want at my web site. To contact me and sooner or later get a reply, click here. To get more help in a classroom, sit closer to the front. Teachers seem to give those students more attention. You can forward or reprint "Mark's Musings" freely but please keep the credits attached. Credit removal is not only dangerous, it may cause cancer. Original material and commentary © 2008 by Mark Raymond. I update this blog with a copy of this post daily and occasionally toss in bonus material on the weekends. Look for the label that says "Weekend" and you can bring them all up with one click. My personal mission statement and my license plate is still John 3:30. Still crazy after all these years.

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WORDS for YOUR WEEKEND: "A mother should not be a person to lean on, but a person who makes leaning unnecessary." (Dorothy Fisher, paraphrased)

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