The Mirror

Just a heads up ... my posts this week may be even more irregular than normal. We're finishing up the renovation work on my new home office space and I may wind up without Internet service for a day or two. I'm already going into a cold sweat just thinking about it.

Meanwhile, take this ten question quiz on acne. I truly knew nothing about the subject, apparently.

+++

A LOOK IN THE MIRROR

Age 8: Looks in the mirror and sees Cinderella or Sleeping Beauty.

Age 15: Isn't happy with anything she sees in the mirror. ("Mom, I can't go to school looking like THIS!")

Age 20: Sees herself as too fat / too thin / too tall / too short / hair's too straight / hair's too curly, but decides she's going out anyway.

Age 30: Sees the same thing, but fixes what she can, and goes out anyway.

Age 40: Sees the same thing, but says "I've had my shower / bath and at least I look clean" and goes out anyway.

Age 50: Looks in the mirror and says, "It is what it is," and goes out anyway.

Age 60: Looks in the mirror and still isn't happy, but reminds herself she's still able to look in the mirror and goes out. Conquers the world.

Age 70: Looks in the mirror and sees wisdom, laughter, and ability, and then goes out and enjoys life.

Age 80: Doesn't bother to look. Puts on her purple hat and goes out to just have fun.

Age 90: Looks in the mirror and remembers the girl who saw Cinderella or Sleeping Beauty and decides she got it right the first time.

[Pastor Tim's Illustrations; edits and additional material by Mark Raymond]

+++

WORD for YOUR WEEK: While talking with a friend while we sat in the hospital waiting room during my Dad's recent surgery, he was curious about the origin of the term, "Indian Summer." I've read three separate origins for the phrase, which first appeared in print circa 1778. One ascribes it to a period of Native American attacks on colonial settlements, another a grass fire burning time when Indians would flush out as much game as they could in the late fall to store for the lean winter months, and a third says it is merely called that because it was the Indians who informed the Europeans about the weather condition. Old Farmer's Almanac ascribes to the first, and has more specifics here. Whatever the explanation, we've certainly been enjoying some mild, warm days here in Michigan recently.

+++

P.S. - Pastor Tim's list above only went to 80. In honor of my step-mom, who turns 90 at the end of the month, I added the last one.

Mark's Musings shows itself on an RSS Feed and is also available via e-mail each weekday. Reflect upon your own subscription by clicking here.

Left-Handed Compliment

My wife is into photography a little bit. You know that.

She has not gone as far as this guy has, however. Alan Jaras has actually removed the lens from his camera and replaced it with a series of transparent and textured materials, and then shoots a beam of light through his makeshift lens directly onto 35mm film.

He then develops the film and digitally scans it. The photos at the link are all as they appear on the film itself. No computer enhancements have been added.

Awesome.

+++

AN OLDIE BUT A GOODIE

We were having some friends of ours over for dinner one evening. Prior to the meal, the wife was looking at some of the photographs I had framed and mounted on our walls.

"Did you take these photographs?" she asked.

"Why, yes, I did."

"They're marvelous," she gushed. "You must have a very good camera."

The following week my wife and I went to have dinner at their house. After the meal, I asked the hostess if she had cooked the meal herself.

"Why yes, I did," she replied.

"It was delicious," I said. "You must have very good pots and pans."

[source unknown; several websites have it posted]

+++

WONDER for YOUR WEEK: Does a camera weigh more after a picture is taken?

+++

Mark's Musings comes free every weekday via an RSS Feed and e-mail and you can get it by clicking here.

Compliment?

So if you've always wanted to grow a mustache but your wife was totally against the idea, now you have a good reason that she shouldn't be able to refuse.

I already have one or I'd totally be entering this contest. It's for such a good cause. Let me know if you enter and what your username is and I'll point the list in your direction.

+++

Driving along on a sunny day, my sister was on top of the world. She was taking her granddaughter for a ride, and had her in the passenger seat next to her.

After a few minutes of pleasant conversation, the granddaughter says, "Grandma, is Grandpa older than you?"

"Why, yes," replied my sister, happy to hear this. "Your Grandpa is a few years older than I am." Wanting to hear more, she goes fishing for a compliment by saying, "Why do you ask, dear?"

"Well," says her granddaughter, "his mustache is a lot bigger than yours."

[as seen in Da Mouse Tracks]

+++

WORDS for YOUR WEEK: "I think your whole life shows in your face and you should be proud of that." (Lauren Bacall)

+++

Mark's Musings shaves an RSS Feed and is also available with pomade via e-mail each weekday. Grow your own subscription with a click here.

Scent Commitment

You know how some people don't just spray on perfume, they marinate in it?

Turns out that can occasionally cause problems.

+++

A young woman is standing at the perfume counter, gazing at all the expensive bottles. She reads the names on them ... "My Sin" ... "Desire" ... "Ecstasy."

Then she looks up at the cosmetics clerk and says, "I don't want to get emotionally involved, I just want to smell nice."

[Basic Jokes.com]

+++

WISDOM for YOUR WEEK: "As dead flies give perfume a bad smell, so a little folly outweighs wisdom and honor." (Ecclesiastes 10:1)

+++

Mark's Musings comes on an RSS Feed or via e-mail each weekday. (E-mail option is on vacation until August 10.) Sniff out your very own subscription here! Facebook readers: click "View Original Post" below to see my entire blog.

Sand Art

When he was younger, my father briefly studied art. I have a charcoal painting he drew hanging on our living room wall. It's gorgeous. Though he was unable to complete his studies, that artistic disposition has since informed much of his life.

He's always been good at drawing, and since then he's created art from old horseshoe nails, old telephone wire, old rocks ... you name it, he can make something beautiful out of it.

Which is probably why this YouTube clip of Ilana Yahav - a woman who's talent is only rivaled by the dearth of information on the Web about her background - moved me so much. Because it reminded me of my Dad.

Using only a lighted glass table, a modicum of sand (which is just a different kind of glass medium, I suppose), and her fingers ... she creates "sand animations" that must be seen to be believed.

So I will show them to you ... all courtesy of list member Diane S.



By the way, you can find her website with several other videos of her work here.

Lunch

So I'm a bit of a bachelor this week as Bonnie and Amanda are staying with the church crew on the "Flint Mission" trip we discussed yesterday.

Which means I'm keeping my own house and packing my own lunches and, you know, burping right out loud and stuff.

If I still used a brown bag as a lunch box, I would want this guy to be filling them up with lunchy goodness.

+++

LUNCH ONE-LINERS

"Jimmy, why did you just swallow that five-dollar bill?"
"C'mon, Mom ... you told me it was my lunch money!"

===

I think my wife is trying to get rid of me. She keeps wrapping my lunch in road maps.

===

The trouble with eating a big Italian meal for lunch is that five or six days later, you're hungry again.

===

I had fast food for lunch. It slowed down considerably when it hit my stomach.

===

[selected from all over the web]

+++

WORDS for YOUR WEEK: "The scientific name for an animal that won't fight its enemies or run away is 'lunch'." (Michael Friedman)

+++

Mark's Musings is served on an RSS Feed and is also available via e-mail each weekday. Hungry for your own subscription? Get one here.

Survey

While the story of Ms. Susan Boyle ("Britain's Got Talent") is still hot, here's another British woman - who kind of looks like Susan, actually - with a bit of an odd hobby.

She collects soap.

Lots and lots of soap.

+++

A marketing flunky stopped a pedestrian on a street corner recently and explained that he was doing some market research. Then he asked the passerby, "What shaving cream do you use?"

The man answered, "Babas."

"All right," said the marketing guy, making a note of it though he'd never heard of that brand, "and what after shave do you use?"

"Babas."

In fact, the answer to all the marketing questions - deodorant, toothpaste, shampoo, soap - resulted in the Babas brand answer.

Finally, in frustration, the marketing guy said, "I've got to know. What is this 'Babas' brand? Something new? Something from a foreign country?"

"Brand?" asked the pedestrian. "Baba is my roommate!"

[Clean Humor Digest; bet you saw that punchline coming....]

+++

WORDS for YOUR WEEK: "Wouldn't it be nice to be rich enough to be able to throw soap away right after the letters have washed off?" (Andy Rooney, paraphrased)

+++

Mark's Musings comes on an RSS Feed and washes behind its ears in your e-mail each weekday. Get your own subscription by clicking here.

Painting

A company called San Base Studio in Toronto, Canada, has created something it calls "Digital Dynamic Painting." It's digital because it uses computer technology; it's dynamic because it constantly changes, and it's painting because it's art. And they claim it's never the same picture twice. If you're a traditionalist, you can also get printed pictures in super-high-definition resolution.

Wall units start at $695. You can also get the technology with a DVD player for your company's waiting room.

By the way, before everyone writes to comment on it, there's an small misspelling in the banner on the site. I guess it's just a reminder that these people are artists, not English majors.

+++

AN OLDIE BUT A GOODIE

Being pretty new to computers, I was learning some of the little programs that came with it, and using the Paint program, I managed to create a very credible "still life" painting of a basket of fruit. After admiring it for awhile, I made a color print of it and mailed it to my grown daughter.

She called when it arrived.

"Isn't it good?" I asked.

She chuckled and in a voice that reminded me of my own so many years ago, she said, "Mom, it's beautiful. We put it on the refrigerator."

[Syman Says]

+++

WORDS for YOUR WEEK: "Every child is an artist. The problem is how to remain an artist once we grow up." (Pablo Picasso)

+++

Mark's Musings is also sent each weekday via email. You can get your very own subscription for free by clicking here.

Too Thin

Hey, I posted a new video clip here on the blog last night (it's the entry just below this one). It's about how Hollywood and Madison Avenue distort our image of what beauty should look like. Which led me to today's post.

+++

TOP TEN SIGNS OUR CELEBRITIES ARE *TOO* THIN

10. "CUT! Get the EMTs, Teri's slipped down the shower drain. Again."

9. He can elude the paparazzi just by turning sideways.

8. Her most recent meal refuses to enter her stomach for fear of being alone. So alone.

7. Can't wear designer dresses because her clavicle bones keep cutting through the spaghetti straps.

6. When she gets a run in her pantyhose, she falls through.

5. Needs a fat suit to star in a biopic about Twiggy.

4. His agent can submit both the prospective manuscript AND the actor through the slot in the door.

3. She's constantly being knocked over by the photons from camera flashes.

2. The new breast implants doubled her weight.

AND THE NUMBER ONE SIGN OUR CELEBRITIES ARE *TOO* THIN?

1. You can count his vertebrae. From the front.

[selected from Chris White's Little Fivers on Health and Beauty; family-friendly edits and formatting by Mark Raymond]

+++

WORD for YOUR WEEK: My daughter didn't understand what I meant when I used the word "listless" this past weekend. I originally thought it had something to do with sailing but upon further investigation, it comes from the same root word that gives us "lust" and "desire." Adding the "less" to the end, of course, adjusts it to mean just the opposite. So if you are "listless," you have no desires, no energy, and/or no interest in anything. (Of course, it could also mean going to the grocery store empty handed.)

+++

Mark's Musings is available via email each weekday and you can get your own gorgeous subscription for free simply by clicking here.

Charm is Deceitful

I love it when giant corporations do something Biblical, even if they're not aware of it. Dove, the people who make soap and shampoo and cosmetics and other skin care products (not to mention some pretty awesome chocolates), have sponsored for some time now a "Campaign for Real Beauty."

I have only just this week, however, run across their series of videos. Here's my favorite:



Get your kids and grandkids onto this site, watch the rest of the videos, and teach them what real beauty is all about.

"Charm is deceptive, and beauty is fleeting; but a woman who fears the Lord is to be praised." (Proverbs 31:30)