Showing posts with label news. Show all posts
Showing posts with label news. Show all posts

Wednesday, June 12, 2013

It Caught My Eye

There's a brand new flavor in Lollipop Land and it rhymes with "dressed silk" ... I'll give you a minute.

Need more time? Go ahead, I'll wait.

Yes, if the picture didn't give you enough of a clue, there is now a breast milk lollipop on the market. Adds a whole new level of meaning to "sucker."

And you thought I was kidding.

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On a completely different note, and I'm not sure why this caught my eye, but it did: Thrivent Financial, the insurance arm of the Lutheran Church, is opening up its doors to sell insurance to all denominations now, after a 111-year policy of insuring only Lutherans. Another economic victim of waning church attendance in America.

But they are going to open their doors slowly. Thrivent President Brad Hewitt said it is more like "a 50-year, (than) a five-year plan."

They are starting with just friends and family members of their current Lutheran subscribers.

"Everybody find your Lutheran buddy! If you don't have one, get one!" (Oblique Toy Story reference.)

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And this just in - uh, two weeks ago - Japan has stopped buying U.S. wheat. Why? Because they fear that wheat genetically doctored by agriculture giant Monsanto may creep into the commercial supply.

Really?

These are people who still have rampant radiation running loose in parts of their country. If they're not going to buy our wheat, what does that say about how bad this Monsanto thing is getting?

Hmmmmm.

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Mark's Musings is published on a periodical basis - right now on Mondays, Wednesdays, and Fridays - but that may change without notice. Find me on Twitter at http://www.twitter.com/markmusings. This blog is considered to be a digital periodical publication and is filed as such with the U.S. Library of Congress; ISSN 2154-9761. So what catches your eye?

Friday, April 19, 2013

Friday Fodder

A few odds and ends here at the end of the week.

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Spring seems to have finally come to us here in Michigan. I know because yesterday we had our first tornado watch of the season.

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Long time readers will know that I am a fan of Douglas Adams' Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy series of books. In that world, posits Adams, the Earth is merely a supercomputer built by a super-intelligent race of beings to come up with the question to the answer to life, the universe, and everything.

Well now, apparently, certain physicists are going to see if there's any truth to that fictional hypothesis.

And you thought I was kidding.

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Have you been to Disney World and gone into one of their theaters where you get to experience *more* than just 3-D? Where the seats move, things tickle the back of your legs, a breeze blows across your face ... all in conjunction with what's happening on screen?

They are now calling that "4DX." At least in Japan. And that's where they will test it out on none other than the upcoming Iron Man 3 release. PC Magazine has the story here.

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Finally, a link that I'm sure will not work in a month, possibly even next week ... but here's breaking news on the Boston Marathon bombing brought to you by CNN and Yahoo.

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Mark's Musings is published on a periodical basis - right now on Mondays, Wednesdays, and Fridays - but that may change without notice. Find me on Twitter at http://www.twitter.com/markmusings. This blog is considered to be a digital periodical publication and is filed as such with the U.S. Library of Congress; ISSN 2154-9761.

Wednesday, March 20, 2013

NASA, Phasers, Guns, and Mr. Rogers

I just keep stumbling across these interesting tidbits in my Internet travels, which have actually increased since I retired (to my work ethic's chagrin).

The National Aeronautics and Space Administration (NASA) was recently called on the carpet by Congress to explain why they haven't done more to locate and advise the public on Near-Earth Objects (NEOs), such as the meteor that exploded over Russia recently.

The answer? Congress keeps cutting their funding.

Duh! And d'oh!

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From the science desk comes the invention and miniaturization of the ... are you ready? ... phaser! Seriously, you know that the word laser is an acronym, right? It stands for "Light Amplification by Stimulated Emission of Radiation." Well, scientists in Japan have now done basically the same thing that lasers do, only with sound waves instead of light waves. Those particles are called phonons, so the appropriate name for the process is "phasing."

It was actually first invented about three years ago, but at that time the phonons needed a medium - such as light - to move through. The Japanese research lab has successfully removed the light ride-along piece. Unlike a laser, which can move through the vacuum of space, the phaser needs air to get the job done, so it will only have an earthly application at this time.

They've been able to put it on a microchip, though, so it may well end up replacing quartz as the regulator in all of our timepieces. At least for those of us who still wear a watch instead of peeking at our cell phone for the time.

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Speaking of guns, the website Thumbs and Ammo posits that real men don't need to use a gun, just the power of positive thinking.

So they have dedicated themselves to taking images from popular movies, removing the gun(s), and replacing the trigger fingers with a "thumbs up" sign.

Some of them - such as the one pictured here - are quite funny.

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Finally, today would have been Fred Rogers 85th birthday. Here's an interesting mashup honoring his life as the children's TV host, "Mr. Rogers."



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Mark's Musings is published on a periodical basis - right now on Mondays, Wednesdays, and Fridays - but that may change without notice. Find me on Twitter at http://www.twitter.com/baldmark. This blog is considered to be a digital periodical publication and is filed as such with the U.S. Library of Congress; ISSN 2154-9761. Why yes, it *is* a beautiful day in the neighborhood!

Thursday, March 04, 2010

Kid Money

It looks like the Government is finally facing up to reality with regard to the U.S. poverty line. A recent story on NPR reports that the Commerce Department - via the U.S. Census - is expanding what they look at when they consider poverty in America.

It's not just about money, though that's still the "official" guideline for aid and assistance.

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My wife decided that our 10-year old daughter should finally have her own savings account. Our daughter was thrilled, and they made the excursion to the bank happily.

"Since this is going to be your account, sweetie," said my wife, "I want you to fill out the paperwork." Again, our daughter was happy to take on this "adult" responsibility.

When it came to the blank on the form for "Name of Your Former Bank," our daughter thought for a moment, then penciled in, "Piggy."

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Our precocious four-year old had reached the age where he thought he deserved an allowance. So he approached me after supper one evening and demanded one.

"And just what do you do around here that makes you think you deserve an allowance?" I asked him.

"Well, for one thing," he replied, "I keep your wife occupied all day."


[Clean Humor Digest]

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WISDOM for YOUR WEEK: "Keep falsehood and lies far from me; give me neither poverty nor riches, but give me only my daily bread." (Proverbs 30:8)

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Tuesday, January 26, 2010

Classified Typos

Well, this is hard to believe.

A new study, done in England, seems to suggest that far from eroding our children's literacy skills, sending text messages on their cell phones actually seems to enhance them.

That's just gr8.

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CLASSIFIED TYPOS

1984 CHRYSLER FIFTH AVENUE - 62k miles, ps, pw, won't last.
(Maybe I won't buy it, then.)

FERRET MALE, NEUTERED - gentile.
(Apparently neutered, but not circumcised.)

SILVER TRUMPET - w/two extra moth pieces.
(Not used in a while?)

FIG TREE, POTTED - Indoor/Outdoor, Fruit Baring, $25.
(Don't fig leaves cover things up?)

PEARL DRUMSET - with pro-stand & all drums and symbols, $300.
(May be featured in Dan Brown's next book.)

FOR SALE - One chord of firewood.
(Maybe it used to be a piano.)

LOOKING TO CLEAN HOMES - Call (phone number), leave mess.
(How am I going to get my house through the phone line?)


[selected from "The Word Guy," Rob Kyff via Arcamax; some punchlines written by Mark Raymond]

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WORDS for YOUR WEEK: "The young always have the same problem - how to rebel and conform at the same time. They have now solved this by defying their parents and copying one another." (Quentin Crisp)

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Wednesday, September 02, 2009

Superheroes vs. The Economy



Well, I'm not sure if this is a good thing or a bad thing, but the Walt Disney Company has just purchased Marvel Comics.

So now you can have Donald Duck hang out with Howard the Duck. Or maybe Minnie, Mickey, Pluto, and Goofy could be the next Fantastic Four. Or perhaps we'll see a Pixar version of The X-Men. Iron Man and WALL-E could hang out together.

I wonder how long it will take for the House of Marvel to ramp up an attraction at one of the Disney Worlds. (sigh) And the rich get richer.

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SIGNS YOUR SUPERHERO HAS BEEN HIT BY THE ECONOMIC DOWNTURN

"Avengers Assemble! Umm, behind the Hot Topix ... as soon as we all finish our shifts."

Iron Man's newest suit is made entirely from recycled cans.

In the Electronics section of Craigslist, there's been a sharp increase in the posting of used Illudium Q-36 Explosive Space Modulators.

Wolverine has had to pawn his adamantium claws and replace them with titanium sporks.

The Flash is picking up extra cash by powering the city with his gigantic hamster wheel.

Batman is riding the bus to crime scenes.

Superman unveils his Studio Apartment of Solitude.


[Chris White's Top Five on Comics with edits and additional material by Mark Raymond]

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WONDER for YOUR WEEK: If Spider-Man can stick to anything he touches, wouldn't he stick to his gloves instead of the wall?

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Friday, July 24, 2009

Walter Cronkite


Well, the weather was touch-and-go all the way down to the stadium yesterday, but it cleared up nicely shortly after we arrived. The popcorn, sadly, tasted like it had been popped in the early 70s and left since then on the corner of Cold and Alone, but the ballpark hot dogs were delicious, and the company was grand. The Tigers, however, lost 2-1 in yet another pitcher's duel - the fourth one in their past five games.

Meanwhile, on with this week's Friday post.

Walter Cronkite passed away one week ago at the age of 92. He was, in many respects, the "gold standard" of broadcast journalism and earned the title of "the most trusted man in America." He never wanted to be called an "anchorman," but took the title "Managing Editor" of the CBS Evening News. He loved sailing, and wrote two books about his travels. The Journalism School at Arizona State University was renamed in his honor in 1984, three years after he retired from daily broadcasts. He has also written a book about his journalistic experiences, and received five national awards recognizing his work, including an Emmy.

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THE WIT AND WISDOM OF WALTER CRONKITE

"America's healthcare system is neither healthy, caring, nor a system."

"Everything is being compressed into tiny tablets. You take a little pill of news every day - 23 minutes - and that's supposed to be enough."

"I can't imagine a person becoming a success who doesn't give this game of life everything he's got."

"The perils of duck hunting are great ... especially for the duck."

"We are not educated well enough to perform the necessary act of intelligently selecting our leaders."

"I asked my doctors if I'd be able to play singles tennis and they said I could. That made me very happy since I haven't played in five years."

"I regret that, in our attempt to establish some standards, we didn't make them stick. We couldn't find a way to pass them on to the next generation, really."

From his CBS Evening News Farewell: "I'll be away on assignment, and Dan Rather will be sitting in here for the next few years. Good night."

"I think somebody ought to do a survey as to how many great, important men have quit to spend time with their families and then spent any more time with their family. Probably less."

"And that's the way it is."

[selected from seven separate websites by Mark Raymond]

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Another fairly quiet weekend is on tap for us. Maybe we can try and finish a couple of household projects and find out where all these wasps are coming from.

Anyway, I'll see you on Monday.

Mark

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WEB SITE of the WEEK: Since I've been on my new job I've been able to be home at supper time and, in fact, have taken responsibility to make about half of the meals. We've got a meal rotation of about 30 different tastes and combinations, but of course we tend to make our favorites most often. Should I ever need inspiration, however, I can visit http://www.discusscooking.com/, and view some of the forum threads from 20,000 other chefs and cooks. You have to become a member to post your thoughts and recipes (it's free), but you can read what other people are cooking and doing and remarking upon to your heart's and stove's content. (A tip o'the Mark's Musings cap to Randy Cassingham.)

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Mark's Musings is sent each weekday - more or less - using Ezine Director and I pay a little extra every day to make sure those folks are certified by Habeas to be a safe sender of e-mail. I'm spam-free, tax-free, duty-free, and fat-free. Subscribe, view past issues in my Archives, and otherwise pleasantly click your mouse at my web site. To contact me and sooner or later get a reply, click here. I saw a moose with a cell phone. He was getting a call from the wild. You can forward or reprint "Mark's Musings" freely but please keep the credits attached. The credits never want to visit the corner of Cold and Lonely. Original material and musings © 2009 by Mark Raymond. I update this blog with a copy of my post daily and occasionally with "bonus material" whenever the mood or muse strikes. Look for the label that says "bonus" and you can bring all that extra material up with one click. My personal mission statement remains John 3:30. Find me on Facebook at http://www.facebook.com/baldmark/. In accordance with the prophecy.

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WORDS for YOUR WEEKEND: "What you will do matters. All you need is to do it." (Judy Grahn)

Tuesday, July 21, 2009

Buy One Anyway

Because my wife works for our local newspaper - what's left of it, anyway, after two rounds of voluntary retirement buyouts and one of layoffs - I found this hilarious.

Thursday, June 25, 2009

Headlines

Like most Comcast Internet Service Providers, I suppose, I use their launch page as my home page; the first page that comes up when I start my web browser. That gives me a brief overview in headlines and snapshots about what's going on in the world today. And yesterday, of course.

Another site that will do that and do it very well, indeed, is Google News.

Scrolling down will get you news from just about every category imaginable, all posted within the last hour.

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UNINTENTIONALLY FUNNY HEADLINES

New Housing for Elderly Not Yet Dead

Local High School Dropouts Cut in Half

Grandmother of Eight Makes Hole in One

Dealers Will Hear Car Talk at Noon

Marijuana Issue Sent to Joint Committee

Hospitals are Sued by Seven Foot Doctors

Police Found Safe Under Blanket

Taxman Crushed in Orange Juice Case

New Study of Obesity Looks for Larger Test Groups


[Net 153s Smile A Day, but they've been floating around the web forever]

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WISDOM for YOUR WEEK: "...a righteous man will be remembered forever. He will have no fear of bad news; his heart is steadfast, trusting in the Lord." (Psalm 112: 6-7)

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