NASA, Phasers, Guns, and Mr. Rogers

I just keep stumbling across these interesting tidbits in my Internet travels, which have actually increased since I retired (to my work ethic's chagrin).

The National Aeronautics and Space Administration (NASA) was recently called on the carpet by Congress to explain why they haven't done more to locate and advise the public on Near-Earth Objects (NEOs), such as the meteor that exploded over Russia recently.

The answer? Congress keeps cutting their funding.

Duh! And d'oh!

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From the science desk comes the invention and miniaturization of the ... are you ready? ... phaser! Seriously, you know that the word laser is an acronym, right? It stands for "Light Amplification by Stimulated Emission of Radiation." Well, scientists in Japan have now done basically the same thing that lasers do, only with sound waves instead of light waves. Those particles are called phonons, so the appropriate name for the process is "phasing."

It was actually first invented about three years ago, but at that time the phonons needed a medium - such as light - to move through. The Japanese research lab has successfully removed the light ride-along piece. Unlike a laser, which can move through the vacuum of space, the phaser needs air to get the job done, so it will only have an earthly application at this time.

They've been able to put it on a microchip, though, so it may well end up replacing quartz as the regulator in all of our timepieces. At least for those of us who still wear a watch instead of peeking at our cell phone for the time.

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Speaking of guns, the website Thumbs and Ammo posits that real men don't need to use a gun, just the power of positive thinking.

So they have dedicated themselves to taking images from popular movies, removing the gun(s), and replacing the trigger fingers with a "thumbs up" sign.

Some of them - such as the one pictured here - are quite funny.

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Finally, today would have been Fred Rogers 85^th birthday. Here's an interesting mashup honoring his life as the children's TV host, "Mr. Rogers."



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Mark's Musings is published on a periodical basis - right now on Mondays, Wednesdays, and Fridays - but that may change without notice. Find me on Twitter at http://www.twitter.com/baldmark. This blog is considered to be a digital periodical publication and is filed as such with the U.S. Library of Congress; ISSN 2154-9761. Why yes, it *is* a beautiful day in the neighborhood!

Tigers in the Dark

Many Americans will receive the "gift" of an extra hour of sleep this weekend.

If you're in one of the States that observe Daylight Saving Time, remember to set the clocks back an hour before you go to bed Saturday night. You'll find the sun out a little bit earlier on, appropriately, Sunday.

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Many years ago a circus was broadcast live on television in front of a large audience, and one of the acts featured a lion tamer and a cage full of Bengal tigers.

The trainer entered the cage and locked the door behind him. The spotlights highlighted the cage and as the television cameras moved in closer, the audience watched in suspense. The trainer put the fierce cats through their paces, but in the middle of the performance, the unexpected happened: the power failed and the lights went out!

For twenty or thirty long seconds, the trainer was stranded, locked in with the tigers, knowing they could see him perfectly, but he could not see them at all. His whip and a small stool were all that stood between him and certain death.

But he survived, and when the lights came back on, he finished his performance to a standing ovation.

Later, in an interview, the trainer was asked how he felt knowing the tigers could see him but he was completely in the dark. He admitted that fear had sent a chill down his spine, but then he realized that the tigers didn't know he couldn't see them. "I just kept cracking my whip," he said, "and I kept talking to them until the lights came back on. And they never knew I couldn't see them."

The parallel to what occasionally happens in our own life is unmistakable. At some point, we are all fighting tigers in the dark, terrors we cannot see. But if we trust to what we know, just keep cracking our whip, and wait for the Light, all will be well.

[A Dose of Inspiration via Wit and Wisdom; slightly rewritten by Mark Raymond]

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WEBSITE of the WEEK: NASA says there are 818 asteroids larger than half-a-mile across in near Earth space. Though they are confident that none appear to be headed our way, there is now a website where you can check the data about what would happen if one did at http://www.purdue.edu/impactearth. You can fill in your own measurements, or use the drop down lists and take one of their suggestions.

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Mark's Musings is available via an RSS Feed, a Facebook Note, the Amazon Kindle and via e-mail each weekday (usually). Subscriptions are free. ISSN 2154-9761.

Alien Conversation

Let us bid September a fond "adieu" and rummage through our closets to find our autumn jackets as we welcome October.

And let us say "hello" to a potential New Earth.

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From deep in space, two aliens are conversing.

The first remarks, "The dominant life forms on the earth planet have developed satellite-based weaponry."

"Are they an emerging intelligence?" inquires the second alien, who looks remarkably similar to the first.

"I do not think so," replies the first alien. "They have them aimed at themselves."

[Joe's Clean Laffs]

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WISDOM for YOUR WEEK: "Ah, Sovereign Lord, you have made the heavens and the earth by your great power and outstretched arm. Nothing is too hard for you." (Jeremiah 32:17)

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Mark's Musings is available via an RSS Feed, a Facebook Note, the Amazon Kindle and via e-mail each weekday (usually). Subscriptions are free. ISSN 2154-9761.

Moon Landing

Forty-one years ago today my Grandpa Hillman let me stay up late and just before 10:00 p.m. (EST), we sat together in his living room and watched (on a black-and-white television) a man walk on the moon for the very first time.

NASA still has some quite nice features posted from the 40^th anniversary last year.

Of course, if it happened now, the "One Small Step for Man" line would have gone out via Twitter, Neil Armstrong would have updated his Facebook status with "The Eagle Has Landed," and Buzz Aldrin would have sent video of the whole thing back to Earth with his iPhone.

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THINGS WE'RE HAPPY NEIL ARMSTRONG *DIDN'T* SAY
When he took that first step on the Moon

"That's one small step for a man, one giant bonus payday for *this* astronaut. Yeahhhh, buddy!"

"Hey, Buzz! Tell Russia 'Neener neener neener!' "

"The Moon is mine! Bwa-ha-ha-ha-ha!"

"So I'm on the Moon, Dad. The Moon! Is THIS good enough for you???!!!"

"Hey, I think I can see my house from here."

(singing) "When the moon hits your eye like a big pizza pie..."

[written by Mark Raymond; inspired by Chris White's Top Five on SciFi]

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WORDS for YOUR WEEK: "It's a brilliant surface in that sunlight. The horizon seems quite close to you because the curvature is so much more pronounced than here on earth. It's an interesting place to be. I recommend it." (Neil Armstrong)

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Mark's Musings touches down on an RSS Feed, lands on a Facebook Note, fires a booster rocket on the Amazon Kindle and visit orbiting satellites via e-mail each weekday (usually). Subscriptions are free. ISSN 2154-9761.

Moon Love

It's a sacrificial love story, in four minutes and forty-five seconds, and with thanks to Jesus at the end, this will tug at your heartstrings for no known reason.





I know, I know, I'm just a sedimental old fool.

February de-Monthed

Today is Mardi Gras.

Officially it's Shrove Tuesday, but more commonly known as "Fat Tuesday."

As we make our preparations to begin the season of Lent, it might do us good to remember our place in the universe. Get a sense of that - well, a little bit, anyway - by visiting Experience the Planets.

It's a website that hosts artistic renditions of the eight planets in our solar system, backed by some awesome ambient music. It reminded me of being in a planetarium, really.

And as a bonus, you can download these artistic vistas as wallpaper for your computer desktop.

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A PRESS RELEASE

Emboldened by their success in declaring that Pluto was not a planet, the International Astronomical Union (IAU) determined this week by a close vote that February is too short to be considered a true month. It has, however, been granted the newly-created status of "dwarf month."

It shares this dubious distinction with several other calendar time spans, including Labor Day Weekend, Christmas Vacation, and The Time Between When You Were Supposed to Get Your Oil Changed and When You Actually Did.

"It only seems fair," said IAU President Ron Eckers. "February reaches a peak size of 29 days, averaging only 28 days for 75% of the time. Recent research has shown that other periods, such as The Time Between When You Were Supposed to Get Your Oil Changed and When You Actually Did, often exceed this meager time frame.

"In fact, this erratic behavior only strengthens our case that February does not belong in the same classification as the eleven 'true' months."

Eckers also warned that the crop of 30-day "so-called" months should be careful to maintain their number of days. "They're already cutting it close in my book," said Eckers.

[written by Michael Haber via Good Clean Funnies List]

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WORDS for YOUR WEEK: "With every passing hour our solar system comes 43 thousand miles closer to globular cluster 13 in the constellation Hercules, and still there are some misfits who continue to insist that there is no such thing as progress." (Ransom K. Ferm)

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It takes off on an RSS Feed, fires retro-rockets on a Facebook Note, goes on a spacewalk with an Amazon Kindle, and reports back to Houston via e-mail each weekday. Let Mark's Musings increase the ambience of your Inbox. Click here to subscribe.

It Made My Day

You may remember me telling you that several years ago I ran a couple posts on "Life's Little Joys." They were perhaps the most popular thing I'd ever done in this space.

Well, now I've stumbled across a website devoted to folks sharing life's little joys, though not all of them are family friendly. I've selected some of my favorites.

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IT MADE MY DAY

I found out that the horribly ugly "knockoff" purse I had won at a raffle was not a knockoff. It was the real thing and now I am selling it for $1,200. It made my day.

I asked my fourth-graders to draw something organic, which I explained was something that was once living. One of my kids drew a zombie. It made my day.

There's a bully at school who steals my lunch. My mum served him justice. She laced my lunch with laxatives and I let him steal it without a fight. It made my day.

My desk drawer wouldn't close so I pulled everything out. I found a paper I'd been looking for, ten dollars, and an unopened chocolate bar. It made my day.

Expecting to get the answer, "penguins," I asked my three-year-old cousin what kind of birds don't fly? She turned to me and quite earnestly said, "Dead ones." It made my day.

After someone's cell phone went off and disrupted my class, the professor lectured us for 20 minutes about how disruptive they are. She said the next person whose cell phone rang would be kicked out of class. Then her own phone rang. It made my day.

I was working at a special needs day camp and a kid was picking his nose. I told him to stop and he said, "I'm not picking my nose, I'm cleaning my finger." It made my day.

I could hear the bass line of the music from a block away and prepared myself for the inevitable blast of hip hop or rap as the "tricked out" convertible drove past. Turned out the driver was playing Mozart at maximum volume. It made my day.

Today I walked into my school bookstore looking for the wallet I had lost. They found it, then offered me a job and hired me. It made my day.

I was driving and singing the theme song from "Arthur" ridiculously loud with the windows rolled down. I stopped for a traffic light and another car pulled up next to me. They waited a second, and then started singing along with me. It made my day.

My wife bought me a hideously ugly watch for our anniversary because she didn't like the one I was wearing. She kept insisting I wear it and on the day I did, I got mugged. They took only the watch. It made my day.

My 13-year old niece convinced her parents to adopt two kittens instead of one by using a PowerPoint presentation. It made my day.

[selected from itmademyday.com; mild editing by Mark Raymond]

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I'll see you on Monday.

Mark

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WEB SITE of the WEEK: So I was trolling the web, looking for a picture of an old-time handlebar mustache to go with my post from Tuesday, when I ran across the podcast site of The Mustache Rangers at http://www.mustacherangers.com/. It's a throwback to the old-fashioned science fiction radio serial shows. You can listen right from their website or download these short audio clips to a music player for listening later. They kind of remind me of a more droll version of Bob and Doug Mackenzie, the bumbling brothers of Second City TV's "Great White North" segments. One content warning: there are nearly 130 podcasts and I didn't listen to all of them, so I can't tell you there's no bad language, but in the three that I did listen to, there was nothing objectionable and I got the impression that bad language was something they were intentionally trying to stay away from.

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Mark's Musings is sent each weekday using faithful Ezine Director and I pay a little extra every day to make sure my posts are certified by Habeas to be a safe source of e-mail. Subscribe, view past issues in my Archives, and otherwise click your mouse over to my web site. To contact me and sooner or later get a reply, click here. My wife has been home sick for a trio of days, fending off a nasty sinus infection making the rounds of our area. I've been doing my best impression of a man trying desperately to prove he loves her while staying far enough away to not get sick. You can forward or reprint "Mark's Musings" freely but please keep the credits attached. Take off my credits, my wife will box up some germs and ship them straight to your door. Original material and musings © 2009 by Mark Raymond. I update this blog with a copy of my post daily and occasionally with "bonus material" whenever the mood or muse strikes. Look for the label that says "bonus" and you can bring all that extra material up with one click. Pretty cool video posted this past Thursday here. My personal mission statement remains John 3:30. Find me on Facebook at http://www.facebook.com/baldmark/. In the words of Stan Lee, Excelsior!

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WORDS for YOUR WEEKEND: "The future belongs to those who believe in the beauty of their dreams." (Eleanor Roosevelt)

Mindset List 2012

My daughter went back to school this week, which means it's time for my annual visit to the Beloit College "Mindset List."

This humble university, set in its namesake town of Beloit, Wisconsin, strives to give its faculty an understanding of the cultural mindset of the freshman streaming through their doors each fall.

It's an exercise in memory and history for the rest of us, and taking a moment to realize how quickly the years have fallen away.

So, for the class of 2012, here's what they grew up with (and without) and perhaps this will give you a better handle on understanding why some young college students act the way they do.

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SELECTIONS FROM THE BELOIT COLLEGE MINDSET LIST
Class of 2012

Since they were in diapers, karaoke machines have been annoying people at parties.

GPS navigation systems have always been available.

Coke and Pepsi have always used recyclable plastic bottles.

Electronic filing of tax returns has always been an option.

WWW has never stood for World Wide Wrestling.

Films have never been X-rated. Only NC-17.

Wayne Newton has never had a mustache.

IBM has never made typewriters.

There has always been Pearl Jam.

The "Tonight Show" has always been hosted by Jay Leno.

Caller ID has always been available on phones.

They have never heard anyone ask, "Want me to check under the hood?"

Soft drink refills have always been free.

[see the complete list here; all 60 items]

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My daughter has a swim meet tomorrow, and a good friend's daughter is getting married tomorrow, followed by the kickoff Sunday of the fall church season and the more literal kickoff of the National Football League, as the majority of teams will play on Sunday. In short, another busy weekend.

I'll see you on Monday.

Mark

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WEB SITE of the WEEK: If you thought Alaska was gorgeous, try looking clearly and deeply into outer space. At http://hubblesite.org/gallery/album/entire_collection/, you can. The Hubble Telescope has catalogued 1,169 photos of galaxies, solar systems, nebulae, stars, and other cosmic whatnot and has even broken them down into handy designations, such as wallpaper, wall murals, movies, and such. And on October 8, shuttle Atlantis lifts off with a specific mission to upgrade the Hubble and make the images it captures even more spectacular.

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Mark's Musings is still a Habeas-certified spam free mailer. Subscribe, view past issues in the Archives, or help defray - you do know what "defray" means, don't you? Because based on the number of contributions received, I'm pretty sure I'm confusing most of you - publishing costs at my web site. To contact me and yes, I'm a real person and do write back, click here. To scoop stinkin' hard ice cream all day, wear a wrist brace. You'll thank me later. You can forward or reprint "Mark's Musings" freely but please keep the credits attached. The credits are a fragile candle burning in the stiff wind of casual indifference, longing only to keep flame and wick burning together. (Boy, I really need some sleep.) Original material and commentary © 2008 by Mark Raymond. I update my blog with a copy of this post daily and occasional bonus material on the weekends. Look for the label that says "Weekend" and you can bring them all up with one click. My personal mission statement remains John 3:30. Does this post make my butt look big?

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WORDS for YOUR WEEKEND: "It is only necessary to make war with five things: The maladies of the body, the ignorances of the mind, the passions of the body, the seditions of the city, and the discords of families." (Pythagoras)

Man Skills II

Q. I used to find "Mark's Musings" in my Inbox first thing every morning. Now it shows up at all manner of odd times during the day. What's up with that?

A. When I can, I write and schedule the post to be delivered around 2:00 a.m., give or take a few minutes, when Internet traffic is generally lighter. And it used to be that no matter how hard or how long my day was, I would still stay up - often into the wee hours of the morning - to make sure your post was there fresh and early every day. But lately I've decided to try and treat myself a little better, in hopes of living longer, and that means getting a little more sleep, and *that* means writing the post when I can find a hole in my schedule. I'll try to get it there for you as soon each day as I can, but there will be some days (like today), when it will come when I finish writing, whenever that may be. Thanks to everyone who wrote to ask about me!

Meanwhile, here's part two of a post that looks like it's written for men, but I have a hunch most women could take these tips to heart, as well.

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SKILLS A MAN SHOULD MASTER
Part the Second (of Three)

Understand quantum physics - Enough so that you could accept a quarter might, at some point, pass straight through the table when dropped. Read "The Quantum World: Quantum Physics for Everyone" by Kenneth W. Ford.

Feign interest - Good place to start? Quantum physics.

Make a bed.

Describe a glass of wine in one sentence without using the terms "nutty, fruity, oaky, finish, or kick" - I once stood in a wine store in West Hollywood where the owner described a pinot noir he favored as, "a night walk through a wet garden." I bought it. I don't know which was more right, the wine or the vision that he placed in my head.

Shuffle a deck of cards - I play cards with guys who can't shuffle, and they lose. Always.

Tell a joke - Here's one: Two guys are walking down a dark street when a mugger approaches them and, brandishing a gun, demands their money. They both grudgingly pull out their wallets and begin removing their cash. Just then, one guy turns to the other, hands him a bill, and says, "Here's that $20 I owe you." [Or any other joke you've read in Mark's Musings -- MR]

Speak to an eight-year old so they will hear you - Use his first name. Don't use baby talk. Don't crank up your energy to match his. Ask questions and wait for answers. Follow up. Concentrate on seeing the child as a person of his own.

Speak to a waiter so he will hear you - You don't own the restaurant, so don't act like it. You own the transaction. Don't speak into the menu. Make eye contact. Be confident. All restaurants have secrets - let it be known you expect to see some of them.

Speak to a dog so it will hear you - Go ahead, use baby talk.

Ask for help - Guys who refuse to ask for help are the most cursed men of all.

Say no.

Recite one poem from memory - Here's a good one by William Yeats:

When you are old and gray and full of sleep,
And nodding by the fire, take down this book,
And slowly read, and dream of the soft look
Your eyes had once, and of their shadows deep;

How many loved your moments of glad grace,
And loved your beauty with love false or true,
But one man loved the pilgrim soul in you,
And loved the sorrows of your changing face;

And bending down beside the glowing bars,
Murmur, a little sadly, how Love fled
And paced upon the mountains overhead
And hid his face amid a crowd of stars.

[Abridged for length and family-friendliness by Mark Raymond from an article by Leif Parsons in Esquire magazine; Part the Last next Friday]

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Again, sorry the post is so late today ... I've been putting in a ton of overtime at the office, and I have to be there early again Saturday morning, plus our band concert last night sucked up a lot of my time and energy. No excuses, just explanations. I'll try to do better.

And I'll see you on Monday.

Mark

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WEB SITE of the WEEK: Check out NASA's "virtual tour" through 50 years of space flight history at http://www.nasa.gov/50years. But drag your mouse around because there are hidden "Easter eggs" of material in each decade.

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Mark's Musings is a Habeas-certified spam free mailer. Subscribe, view past issues in the Archives, and help defray publishing costs at my web site. To contact Mark, click here. To keep retail store personnel from asking if you need help, pick up or put at least one thing in your hand or basket. You can forward or reprint "Mark's Musings" freely but please keep the credits attached. The credits should never be given a day off. Original material and commentary © 2008 by Mark Raymond. I update my blog with a copy of this post daily and extra thoughts, the occasional video, and other things that go bump in the night on the weekends. Look for the label that says "Weekend" and you can bring them all up with one click. My personal mission statement is John 3:30. Keep those questions coming, folks!

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WORDS for YOUR WEEKEND: "An opinion should be the result of thought, not a substitute for it." (Jef Mallett)

Man and Weddings

I have some good friends who have raised three daughters and one son. The girls have all grown into beautiful women and now my friends find themselves on the double-barreled end of a financial shotgun with two of the girls getting married within the next 365 days.

But at least neither of them want to get married while orbiting the earth.

A Japanese firm is teaming up with Rocketplane Global, a U.S. private space flight firm to offer suborbital weddings for just about 240 million yen.

That's 2.3 million dollars.

So, Tim and Karen, count your blessings.

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IF MEN WERE IN CHARGE OF WEDDINGS

Blue jeans would be perfectly acceptable wedding attire.

Tuxedoes would have team logos emblazoned on the back.

All weddings would be scheduled around sports playoffs.

Wedding invitations would probably mention something about a "ball and chain."

Only feeble old men and children would be allowed to dance with the bride.

Big, slobbery dogs would be eligible for the role of Best Man. Especially if they could fetch.

The phrase, "Tailgate Reception" would be commonplace.

Weddings would have an admission price for all the guests to cover ceremony expenses.

The wedding ceremony would last no longer than half-time.

"You may now fist bump the bride."

[From discount-invitations.com with edits and additional material by Mark Raymond]

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WISDOM for YOUR WEEK: "...being confident of this, that he who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus." (Philippians 1:6)

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Mark's Musings is also sent each weekday via email and if you, A. Loyal Reader, do take this post to be your own, please signify by clicking here and get your own subscription for free.

Astronomy Lesson

NASA intends to return to the Moon by the year 2020, and begin the process of setting up a human colony there.

But you can already purchase your own little chunk of lunar real estate, thanks to Lunar Embassy. They're also selling ".moon" and ".mars" domain names so you can be the first on your block to set up a web page on celestial servers not located here on Earth.

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QUICK ASTRONOMY LESSON

Q. What is a comet?
A. Comets have been described as dirty snowballs, snowy dirtballs, and everything in between. Comets are a cold mixture of frozen water, dry ice, and bits of dusty material left over from the formation of the solar system. They're like "cosmic refrigerators," keeping all those elements "on ice."

Q. What is the most famous comet?
A. Halley's Comet, of course. It returns to our solar system every 76 years, approximately. It came through in 1835, the year Mark Twain was born. Twain said he hoped to be alive when it came around again in 1910, and he was. He died the day after the comet reached perihelion. (The closest point to the sun an object will get.)

Q. What is an asteroid?
A. Asteroids are snowy dirtballs - without the snow. They're typically made of iron and nickel or just a stony blend of rock-like stuff. Most orbit the sun between Mars and Jupiter. Some say they are parts of planets that never formed, and some say they are parts of planets that formed, but broke apart later.

Q. What is a meteor?
A. Meteors are fragments that break off from both comets and asteroids and enter Earth's atmosphere. The intense heat generated by the friction of entering our atmosphere at high speed vaporizes most of them, and you'll see a "shooting star." Any bits that actually make it all the way to the ground are labeled meteors. The largest meteor ever found in the United States landed in a Nebraska wheat field and weighed 2,360 pounds.

Q. Has anyone ever been hit by a meteorite?
A. Yes, at least two. Annie Hodges of Sylacauga, Alabama, was napping on her couch on November 30, 1954, when an eight-pound meteorite crashed through the roof and hit her. Although her leg was badly bruised, she was more shocked than hurt. On June 21, 1994, Jose Martin and his wife, Vicenta Cors, were driving from Madrid to Marbella in Spain when a three-pound meteorite smashed through their windshield and broke the little finger on Martin's right hand.

Q. Has anyone ever been killed by a meteorite?
A. There is no recorded or proven case.

Q. How about hailstones?
A. Yes. In the Gopalganj region of Bangladesh in 1986, 92 people died after being hit by huge hailstones weighing more than two pounds.

[taken with my appreciation from Knowledge News]

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Here's your mission for this weekend: Find a spot somewhere far away from city lights. The darker, the better. Bring a blanket and lay back on it, watching the sky. Just look at the stars. Within minutes, if not moments, you will see little streaks of light flash. They're so quick, you might think your eyes are playing tricks on you, but they're not. You're seeing meteors burn up as they fall through our atmosphere. On any given night, you can do this. The last time I did it I counted over 40 in less than an hour. Ah, good memories.

Hey, my band has another gig this weekend, so I've got to go practice. I'll see you on Monday.

Mark

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WEB SITE of the WEEK: Keep the kids busy this summer by teaching them how to "finger knit." You can use your fingers to knit scarves, headbands, and a few other things without having to use knitting needles at all. Truly. See http://www.wikihow.com/Finger-Knit. Just be sure the kiddies don't wrap the yarn too tightly and cut off their circulation.

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Mark's Musings is a Habeas-certified spam free mailer. Subscribe, view past issues in the Archives, or help defray publishing costs at Mark's web site. To contact Mark, click here. To keep Mark's Musings ad free and give me a great big shot of encouragement, donate to the cause at my website. You can forward or reprint "Mark's Musings" freely but please keep the credits attached. I know some of you don't, and it hurts every time I see that. Original material and commentary © 2008 by Mark Raymond. This paragraph right here falls under the "commentary" part of that sentence. I update this blog with a copy of the post daily, and extra thoughts, the occasional video, and other things that go bump in the night on the weekends. My personal mission statement is John 3:30. Be careful gathering your perspective from the overhead bin as you leave the post, some shifting of brain cells may have occurred.

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WORDS for YOUR WEEKEND: "Nothing we do changes the past; everything we do changes the future." (Source Unknown, and I spent quite some time looking.)

Mars Discoveries

Here's an interesting question that may just win you a bet one day. Is anyone buried on the moon?

Yes.

Eugene Shoemaker was an astronomer and geologist and astronaut-wannabe who was disqualified from the Space Program due to a medical technicality. He instead worked with the teams that chose other astronauts and often sat at Walter Cronkite's elbow during the moon visits of the Apollo spacecraft era, providing technical expertise. His fondest wish was to visit the moon and on January 6, 1998, his ashes were launched with the Lunar Prospector, whose mission was to spend a year mapping the surface of the moon and in July of 1999 NASA crashed the probe into the moon in an attempt to locate water.

A little bit of Shakespeare was etched on the capsule containing his remains:

And, when he shall die,
Take him and cut him out in little stars,
And he will make the face of heaven so fine
That all the world will be in love with night,
And pay no worship to the garish sun.

The original NASA news release is here. Now you can put a name to the man in the moon.

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LATEST DISCOVERIES ON MARS
Now that packs of ice have been found

Several Starbucks franchises.

A Coors Light factory.

Several unemployed NHL coaches.

Hey, doesn't that pack ice look an *awful* lot like the ice missing from Antarctica???

Under the ice is a 10% solution of vermouth, 90% gin, and a very large olive.

A Zamboni.

[thanks once again to Chris White's Top Five on Science with family-friendly edits by Mark Raymond]

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WONDER for YOUR WEEK: How come we only hear about parallel universes? Couldn't there be a perpendicular universe?

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Mark's Musings is also sent via email each weekday. Blast off into your own subscription for free by clicking here.

Space Pen

Now here's something I didn't know ... the Space Shuttle is rigged to be detonated by NASA within two minutes of lift-off if things start to go badly.

Seriously, explosives are attached to the two solid rocket boosters and if they should misfire and it appears that the shuttle will crash onto a populated area, an Air Force officer throws a couple of switches and, blammo, the whole thing goes up in smoke and hydrazine before it can cause a *really* major issue.

Now, if the shuttle goes off course AFTER the first two minutes but before it clears Earth's atmosphere, the crew gets a parachute and some rafts and, well, lots of prayer.

The shuttle Discovery is scheduled to go up tomorrow as I write this, but some online news sources are reporting there is at least a 50% change the launch will be delayed.

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A POPULAR STORY...

When NASA first started sending astronauts into space, they quickly discovered that existing ball point pens would not work in zero gravity conditions.

To combat this problem, the agency spent years and over a million dollars developing a pen that writes in zero gravity, upside-down, on almost any surface - including glass - and at temperatures ranging from below freezing to over 300 degrees Celsius.

The Russians used a pencil.

THE REALITY...

NASA originally used pencils in space, just as Soviet cosmonauts did. The problem, however, was that occasionally the lead would break and the bits of graphite would become hazards in the zero gravity environment. In July of 1965, Paul C. Fisher developed the first "pressurized pen" - completely on his own, NASA had never asked for his help or input - and in December of 1967, after two years of rigorous testing, he sold 400 pens to the Space Administration for $2.95 each. The "Fisher Space Pen" has been used by both Russia and the USA for manned space flights since then.

[first bit from urban legend; second bit from Snopes]

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WONDER for YOUR WEEK: Could an astronaut be the luckiest person on Earth?

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Mark's Musings is also sent via email each weekday. Your own subscription is available for free by clicking here.

No Astronomer

Think Earth has about had the biscuit? Think that maybe it's time for "Plan B"?

The owners of Google and Virgin agree with you. They have created a cooperative venture company - called "Virgle" - to create and establish a human colony on the planet Mars.

Now, maybe it's all an elaborate April Fool's joke, but it sure looks like they're serious. They have a "100-Year Plan" and will start the project in earnest by 2014.

But you can see their plans and apply to be a part of the project right now.

{Note: further research from Mark's Musingites reveal that this was, indeed, a very elaborate April Fool's Day prank from Google and Virgin Atlantic. -- MR}

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SIGNS YOU'RE NOT AN ASTRONOMER

You think...

...Aurora Borealis is the stage name for an exotic dancer.

...Betelgeuse is the stuff that's hard to squeegee off the window of your car.

...A gaseous prominence is Rush Limbaugh.

...Light pollution is a few old beer cans in the yard.

...Pluto is Mickey's sidekick.

...The Northern Lights are a brand of cigarette.

...A Solar Corona is a warm Mexican beer.

...A neutron is a fig cookie.

...A light year is 12 months when you're short on cash.

...Solar wind is what Uncle Leo had after Thanksgiving last November.

[thanks to Andy Blackburn's collection from astronomy newsgroups]

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WONDER for YOUR WEEK: If they find life on Mars, will it taste like chicken, too?

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Mark's Musings is available each weekday via email. Blast off with your own subscription for free by clicking here.

New Earth?

The Guardian reported this past Spring that astronomers at the European Southern Observatory have discovered another planet that could be very Earth-like in its development and could, in fact, contain an oxygen atmosphere and enough water to sustain life as we know it. The article is here.

The planet is called "Gliese 581c" and it circles a red dwarf star about 20 light years away. It's quite a bit closer to that star than we are to our own sun, but because Gliese 581 burns so much cooler than our sun, it all evens out. It's about one-and-a-half times as big as our home here on Earth. The temperature ranges from about 30 to 110 degrees Fahrenheit (or 0 to 40 Celsius).

The thing I found most interesting is that its orbit lasts only 13 days. That's the equivalent of a year in just under two weeks. I'm trying to wrap my head around that.

Using what measurements we know, you'd have to get paid about twice a day. Vacations and holidays would be measured in hours. You'd just be getting over one New Year's Eve party when, whoops, here comes another one!

"Hey, how old are you?"
"About a hundred and twenty minutes!"

At 20 light years and our current methods of space travel, it would only take about 375,000 years to reach Gliese 581c.

Hmmm. Better get started.