Sorry the post is so late today, troops.
But hey, September is National Preparedness Month.
Prepared for what? Let's say "everything."
So, get ready.
How is a hurricane's name selected?
1. They're named after other sources of big winds ... usually Congresspeople.
2. The names are submitted by bitter divorced folks.
3. Selected at random from a 1954 book of baby names.
4. It doesn't really matter and the hurricane just doesn't care.
What do they call the most severe hurricane?
1. A Category 5.
4. An insurance agent's worst nightmare.
If Hurricane Guido with wind speeds of 104 mph leaves the NW African coast on Wednesday at 7:07 a.m. and is traveling west at 16 mph and Hurricane Imelda with wind speeds of 93 mph leaves Key West at 24 mph on Thursday at 11:32 a.m., when will they meet?
1. Saturday at noon, but their luggage would be in Paris.
2. Never, it's a trick question. There are no outgoing hurricanes from Key West. They are only equipped for incoming.
3. Never. Imelda doesn't want anything to do with Guido. He never stops for directions.
4. Sunday morning at a fast food restaurant in Puerto Rico. I think it's called Windy's.
You're flying in a small, single-engine plane. You look up and see a hurricane directly in front of you. What's your first thought?
1. Who's got the right of way here?
2. Is my insurance paid up?
3. Looks like I'm going to miss "Grey's Anatomy" tonight.
4. I've gotta change my shorts!
If a hurricane is coming, what should you NOT do?
1. Start those remodeling plans you've been putting off.
2. Put the dog out.
3. Cancel your homeowner's insurance.
4. Hit the beach!
[selected from LadyHawke's Jokes with heavy weapons-grade editing by Mark Raymond]
WORDS for YOUR WEEK: "The person who is waiting for something to turn up might start with their shirt sleeves." (Garth Henrichs)
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