Bad Cook

List member Mike B. has finally solved an annoying little problem that has plagued us for years. Years, I say!

You know those rolls of aluminum foil, or wax paper, or plastic wrap? How you struggle with them to get the foil/paper/plastic pulled out of the long square box evenly, only to have the whole cardboard roll come leaping out at you? Well, Mike discovered that at either end of the box, there is a cardboard tab you can push in that will hold the roll in place while you extract what you need.

How is it this was America's best-kept secret? My wife - who has been baking for more than two decades - had no knowledge of this little tab that would have come in so helpful on so many occasions. And being the natural skeptic I am, right after I read Mike's email I dashed down to my kitchen, pulled out a carton of aluminum foil ... and, yes! He's right! There's the tab!

Personally, I think Mike should be awarded something. Maybe a Nobel Peace Prize in Kitchen Engineering or something for this discovery, but hey, that's just me.

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AN OLDIE BUT A GOODIE

More signs you may be a bad cook...

Your kitchen's been on fire more than once.

You have the fire department on speed dial.

Your apple pie bubbled over and ate through your heating element.

Your homemade bread is used as a door stop.

Leftover crumbs can be used as kitty litter replacement.

You forgot that you left a gallon of your homemade ice cream on the porch during a record-setting heat wave and the next day not only was it still solid, but it tasted better.

The EPA requires you to put biohazard symbols on your trash cans.

Your family buys Alka Seltzer and Pepto Bismol in bulk.

Your microwave display says "TILT."

Your two best recipes are meatloaf and apple pie, but no one can tell which is which.

Your family heads to the dining room table every time they hear a fire engine siren.

You've used a drill and a crowbar, and *still* can't get the macaroni and cheese out of the pan.

Your family prays AFTER the meal.

[thanks to Pastor Tim's CleanLaughs with edits and rewrites by Mark Raymond]

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WONDER for YOUR WEEK: Can they make just regular toast in France?

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