Friday, June 27, 2008

Rejection Letter

Three weeks ago I shared our family's joy over our son's college graduation. He's been looking for work in his chosen field for some time, now.

If anyone could use a Visual Basic programmer newly minted and fairly fluent in C++ and Java languages, please let us know. He's willing to move and work just about anywhere, and the kid's responsible. You have my word on that.

He's been on several interviews, and recently received his first rejection letter. We commiserated. You don't want to say anything stupid, you know, like, "Well, son, maybe you should frame it. It's the first of many." I think I prefer, instead, to offer up today's chuckle as a creative reply.



Dear [Interviewer's Name],

Thank you for your letter dated [date on original rejection letter].

After careful consideration, I regret to inform you that I am unable to accept your refusal to offer me employment with your firm. This year I have been particularly fortunate in receiving an unusually large number of rejection letters, and with such a varied and promising field of candidates, it is simply impossible for me to accept all refusals.

Despite your company's outstanding qualifications and previous experience in rejecting applicants, I find that your rejection does not meet with my needs at this time. Therefore, I will initiate employment with your firm on the first of the month. I look forward to seeing you then.

Best of luck in rejecting future candidates.


[Your Name]

[Mikey's Funnies]


This is the first weekend in just about two months in which we have no plans. We're hoping to get the garage cleaned out and some yard work done. So, of course, the forecast calls for rain.

I'll see you on Monday.



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WORDS for YOUR WEEKEND: "The most common error made in matters of appearance is the belief that one should disdain the superficial and let the true beauty of one's soul shine through. If there are places on your body where this is a possibility, you're not attractive. You are leaking." (Fran Lebowitz)

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